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Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Is the grass always greener on the other side?

     You sure you don't have what you want right in front of your nose? Oh, sure, it's easy to say, No. But look a little closer. You might surprise yourself. This from William Least Heat-Moon's Prairy Erth :

What I cherish I've come to slowly, usually blindly, not seeing it for some time...

     Don't we do the same thing sometimes? Not see what's (good) coming. Being blind to it for a long time before realizing what we've got.
     It happens all the time really. I think the great majority of the time we've got what we want. The proof of that is when a major change is sprung on us it almost always throws us for a loop. So, again most of the time, we're usually living at the level we should be living at, doing what we should, maxing out on our potential. Again, it's hard to see sometimes. Iyanla Vanzant writes in her book One Day My Soul Just Opened Up :

We have a fixed idea of what we want and what it will look like when it shows up. We hold that idea so firmly that often we are unable to detect that the very thing we want has actually arrived. If it does not look the way we thought it would, or if it does not feel the way we imagined it would, we are unable to detect its presence.

     So we go around looking for the greener grass on the other side of the fence when we've already got it right in our own backyard. Dave Matthews has a song called Jimi Thing.  One of the lyrics is:

What I want is what I've not got / But what I need is all around me

     I'm listening to this book on cds called The Exegesis of Philip K. Dick. And he talks, very convincingly, about how we can derive the most intense satisfaction and pleasure from whatever our life circumstances are. Now, we may insist that's not the case. 'I can't stand my boss.' 'I don't make enough money.' 'I'm in a bad relationship.'
     But chances are whatever it is that's in your life is what you need at this moment. Tomorrow, if your needs change, you'll get something different. But today it is what it is—and for a good reason.
     So don't be so incredibly anxious to change. You've got what you need right now. Live it. Enjoy it.

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